February 2012
7 posts
Lunch
Allison: I think I want something healthy, like salad?
Me & Tom: (blank, gaping stares)
Allison: But, you know, with bacon...
THOUGHTS BECOME THINGS.
Liz: Whenever I hear "hoo-ha" I think of (pause) vaginas.
Me: Oh my god, I was just thinking the same thing!
Liz: I'm glad we're friends.
January 2012
3 posts
My friends are the greatest
Friend: Wait, Vicodin isn't addictive.
Me: Yo, it's extremely addictive.
Friend: (nonchalantly/seriously) No it's not. I have some at home and take them all the time.
December 2011
4 posts
THE PAST FOUR MONTHS CAN JUST GO AHEAD AND EAT MY FUCKING ASS. THAT’S RIGHT. I SAID IT.
November 2011
21 posts
Number of times I get hollered at on a daily basis: >0
Number of times I get hollered at when I am not wearing a bra and haven’t showered: ~1 (that squiggly means “around” not “negative.” assholes.)
Anonymous asked: Not only do I like your blog (haha I found it) but I also am OBSESSED with you secretly. Ok here we go.. I got this idea from a Tumblr spam I got once lol.. I think you like me too and you were always too shy to admit it :3 go to crushmatches(dõt)com (wtf it wont let me link regular) and make an account there. Then look up the profile 'gottagetme19' (me obviously) I left body...
“Simeon’s Dilemma” - WHY?
I...
Science Proves Parallel Universes Exist →
My brain is a terrible thing to waste
Found this little gem, from who knows when, hanging out in my drafts:
Did you know that if you reverse the words “poop” and “cramp” and then make them into one word you get “pooppmarc?” Which, to me, is funny. But that doesn’t mean much because I find a lot of things funny that most people don’t think are funny. And I’m not saying that to...
1 tag
October 2011
8 posts
Dreams be getting big, son.
When I was younger I would say, “I wish [insert something stupid here- i.e. it wasn’t so hot outside].” and my dad would always reply, “If you are going to wish, wish for something big.” Me to myself: “I wish I was black so that I could be Stevie Wonder for Halloween.” “I wish I could wear jean jackets without looking like a lesbian.”
September 2011
14 posts
2 tags
“In the whole entire world, you are the only person, the only person I love or...”
– Angels In America, Tony Kushner
I love this play so hard it hurts me a little. If you haven’t read it, I’ll lend it to you (and then hunt you down when you’re done with it so I get it back). And if you haven’t seen the HBO miniseries of it, I’ll watch it with you because it’s amazing.
(via...
T-T-T-T-Totally dude. →
2 tags
